Lately my self esteem hasnt been too high. For one thing my dads been treating me like shit. My best friend has been doing drugs, drinking, and being just totally bitchy. I hadn't talked to my crush in like forever, and it feels like I don't have that many friends.The only thing out of any of those that got remotely better is today i talked to my crush, he seemed like happy to see me, which felt super good. It used to be that whenever i saw him his face would light up and im sure mine did too, then it was like he didnt give a fuck about me, and now his face lights up again. This morning he was walking in from the bus, and i was walking to try to find a friend, if it had been last week i would have kept going my direction, and he would have kept going his direction, but today was different. When he saw me walking down the hall he starting laughing to himself, ya know, that kind of laugh when someone has a funny storie for you, and i was prepared to just keep being ignored by him but instead he started talking, the fact that he was talking to me like i was the only person on earth he wanted to talk to felt magnificent. I didnt even hear half of what he said I was so happy. My day was off to a great start, just before seeing my crush i had been sitting and talking to a group of girls who i wouldnt normally be talking to, it was fun, we were looking at pictures from a party and making all these perverted jokes, i was happy. First hour was nothing special, well some of the popular girls actually came over to talk to me, im good friends with two of them, and kinda friends with the rest, but they all walked over to me like i was the one they wanted to see, again, i was happy. In my second hour its me, seven guys, and two popular girls, no one ever talks to me, im pretty much invisible in that class, but today was different, i was standing at the end of class waiting for the bell to ring and Eran and Sarah Mac actually included me in their convo. Third hour is always great, it french two, we only have like twelve kids in that class, an amazing group of people. We all get along and we have a pretty cool teacher, shes my only teacher who lets me take my phone out to take pictures! Forth hour was nothing special. Fifth hour wasnt that great, I talked to Adam and Kara a good amount but my best friend, Sarah Edd, got mad at me, and for the stupidest reason on earth! i buy her like everything (she owes me $135 from me buying her 3 pairs of pants, 1 pair of shoes, random other objects, and probably at least another $100 for food). so she asks me for a piece of paper, and i said no, and she got all pissed! so at lunch i talked to Connor the whole time pretty much cuz Sarah was pissed at me, i was actually surprised she sat w/ us today, after she left the MPR Hannah told me that she thought i was being mean to her. If she gets mad about not getting a piece of paper, she needs to learn to grow up. Sixth hour is by far my favourite class, its foods, and i have a bajillion and a half friends in that class. Today we were making cookies, we got to use food colouring to have liek holiday coloured cookies, and my hands were stained green the rest of the day, in fact, they still are. But Miguel was trying to make purple and his hands were so dark he couldnt get it off, his hands looked like he stuck his hands in a vat of dark purple paint. It was hilarious. After we were done cooking, my group and I (me, Miguel, Mackenna, and Ben) were talking, waiting for the bell to ring, and Miguel likes to go off into the distance to Miguel-Land. Ben said something about prostitution being legal in Las Vegas (something like that) and right before that we had been talking about old people who walk aimlessly. and so Miguel, thinking we were still talking about old people walking aimlessly, right after Ben said something about prostitution, said "Oh! My grandma does that!" Our group could not stop laughing. on the way out the door i was practically rolling to seventh hour. Nothing is ever that great about seventh hour, so yeah. nothing really exciting there. In 8th hour tho, we had a sub and so we were messing w/ her. Me, Rylee, and Maria were teasing Jesse(hes a guy, but we call him Jessica to mess with him cause of his hilarious reactions). Rylee would say something like "No, Jesse, I will not take my pants off" and Jesse would say "I never said that, you assholes!" then me Rylee and Maria would start cracking up and the sub kept having to get after us for laughing too much. Everyone else in the class was staring at us like we were idiots. And also in 8th hour, we were reading some story and it said that this chick got abused as a child, and Ali started like humping her desk, the whole class was dieing laughing and the poor sub kept yelling at us in her soft voice. After 8th hour when i was going to my locker Jordan stepped on the back of my shoe and i flew head first into the lockers, luckily no one was at their locker at the time, and also i didnt actually collide with the lockers but i came pretty close, i have no idea why but me and Jordan couldnt stop laughing. I dont kno why it was so funny, but it was. Then as i walked to the frozen outer world I saw my crush's face light up, i stopped mid-step to talk to him. After school nothing was very exciting, my mom took away my phone and my laptop but after she goes to sleep i get on the regular computer, and she is so stupid cause, she says i cant text on my phone, but she gives it to me during the school day, which is when i usually text, strange, i know. Anyway. That was my day, it was pretty good, I think i deserved a good day for a change. for the past couple weeks my happy has been gone pretty much. so i think my happy'll be making a come-back, which is always good.
=]] -Kels